It was early 2011, my daughter was three years old and my son was almost six the first time I heard Sheryl Sandberg’s now infamous Ted Talk. I watched it three times in a row and wept tears of admiration and joy, I felt like she was my soul sister; unapologetic for her success, mom on a mission, and a woman who expected an equal partnership from her spouse, it was beautiful. Many parts of that speech resonated with me, but a particular quote has stuck with me over the years….
“Success and likeability are positively correlated for men and negatively for women. When a man is successful, he is liked by both men and women. When a woman is successful, people of both genders like her less.”
It stung, like the truth often does. This one sentence vibrated at my very core – I had been one of those women who didn’t like successful women for no apparent reason, and I’d also been disliked for no reason at all. It was at that very moment that I decided to change my perspective on women and success, to celebrate my sisters, to raise my daughter to be bold and fearless, and to raise a son that encourages and supports the mother of his future children in finding her success one day.
Every day I work at bringing my best self to the world, and every day I fight mommy guilt, incorrect labels, and the pressures to be a “good kind woman” (which I am, but I also totally kick ass in a negotiation situation). When I saw this video from Pantene yesterday it really hit me, just like Sheryl’s quote did almost three years ago and I had to share it.
In under a minute this video (which is actually an ad for shampoo) captures beautifully the labels that are placed on women in the workforce. This is our reality, but things need to change. 2014 is around the corner, here’s to making it the year that we bust stereotypes; we aren’t bossy and aggressive, we are bold and passionate. And while we are talking about this – let’s be honest; it’s time we stop pulling each other down and start lifting each other up; we need a save a seat at the boardroom table for our girls. Never before in history has there been such a time of opportunity for women to lean in, knock down doors, and claim their share of abundance and opportunity. This excites me beyond words!
So, if there is anything I can do to help you move forward next year (that is legal) please let me know – either in a comment below or a private email, because I want to be a part of your success. Helping other women carve a path to their goals gives me a strange high – seriously, it should be illegal!